What's going on in England?!

Well, from Lorraines (quite random) email I have decided that doing a little blog for you guys to keep up with whats going on in England would be a good idea. You might like reading them, I like writing them, so everyone's happy. I think I'll just keep you up to date with what's going on in Stubb, what's in the news, what's going on in the football world in terms of transfers etc, and whatever else I think you might appreciate. Let me know what you think of them when after you've read them. So here we go;

• Football transfers; Don't worry too much Lorraine, it looks like if you lose Henry you will be getting Samuel Eto'o, because Wenger doesn't want to be left with no world class striker in his squad and Eto'o is apparently out of favour in Barca. As for Spurs, you've been linked to loads of players but the most notable is Darren Bent for a reported £14 million. He rejected the West Ham bid.
• In Stubb today it is pissing it down. The weathers been mental recently; really hot and humid for ages, even when the sun wasn't out, and they reckon there will be thunderstorms later that will sort out the humidity. Had to drive to Asda to get my lunch because of the rain, which is stupid when you consider I work over the road in HMS Collingwood! Got chicken salad sandwich and my new favourite fruit; pineapple. Mmmmm lovely pineapple. What do you think that means? Apple of the pine? Like a mixture between an apple and a pinecone? Makes sense I suppose. In other news the little tea rooms in Stubb that used to be Forboys (spelling?) is now a Chinese eat-in restaurant! Apparently the owners only opened the tea rooms as a way to make some money back so they could afford to open the Chinese. I havn't eaten there yet but it looks good in there. Going back to my trip to Asda, I was running through the rain from my car to the store and I passed two girls running the opposite direction. One of them was shouting "run, it's raining!", then after I passed them one of them shoute "run Matt, it's raining!". I didn't recognise either of them. Maybe I have a stalker! Also today I managed to resist the urge to buy an album from Asda, but that'll change when the new White Stripes album coems out on Monday.
• As for the news, there's loads of stuff about that little girl who went missing; Madeline I think her name is. Apparently they had a tip off that she's buried somewhere. It's sad, but they need to get closure on the situation, it's been all over the news for weeks and weeks. Glastonbury is next weekend. Ben is going, but apparently it's going to be raining all Saturday and Sunday, and if I'm honest I'm not sure I like the look of the line up. Then again I'm not going so it makes no difference to me! I will be going to Truck though. Wish they'd hurry up and announce the line-up!
• One other thing to mention; went to the pub last night and met up with Jordan, Daz, and Joe. When I got there only Jordan and a girl he is dating/seeing/spading were there. He called me over so I sat down and chatted away. Next this stunning girl turns up and just sits next to me, her name's Paige and she's American, although it took me ages to determine that she was American. I think she was with her fella (he was a geek, she could do much better), but anyway, that was very random. That's not the main point though. Later Daz and Joe turned up, but so did this absolute tool who seems to be friends or maybe related to Jordan's date. I recognized him but I didn't know him. Anyway I tried to make conversation so as not to be judgemental, and he seemed to like football (England U21s were on), so we started talking about football. BIG MISTAKE. I've spent every day since Clewee showed me the Tribal football link boning up on all the transfer news. There's nothing I don't know about the current transfer stuff. Anyway, he starts talking shit about everything I say, trying to correct me so that he is right for everything. Me and Ben (he was there too by the way) were saying that Darren Bent is not worth £17 million in our opinions, and he just buts in with "but that's the bid, so he is worth £17 million, he's the complete striker". Fair enough he has his own opinions, but he was one of those people who has to be right about everything and has to win every argument. I had to go and play hangman, the guy was doing my head in. Had to move also because he smoked and so did Jordan's date, and they kept blowing it towards me. Only 2 weeks til the smoking ban! Yesss!!

Is that enough? I think it is. Let me know if you like this, and I'll keep doing it if so.

Matthew/Matt/Simps/Scrumpleton/Tarantino x